This last weekly planning session my companion and I opened up a little more to each other and it really helped with our relationship especially when he told me that I was a good missionary/example! And right after that I said a very sincere prayer in which I was prompted to say that we were ready to move forward and then I just felt the spirit so strong - stronger than I have in a very long time. which is why i told you at the conference:
I feel like I'm finally turning a corner in my mission! I was letting my self slide back in some things and I was sort of going through the motions but then I had an awakening of conscience and realized it wasn't right, and the more I've progressed spiritually, the more I understand what I should do. One of my more recent realizations is more of a re-realization, something I realized back when I was still in elementary school. I have only one chance to go through this mission and this life, and I need to give my all and not keep anything back. Otherwise, there's chances that are wasted where we could have done more - and here's the part i didn't understand in elementary - we are accountable for all the time/chances while in this life - if we are given five talents, ten will be required.
with turning the figurative corner in my mission, I feel like I'm full of light like President Uchtdorf's talk about light and darkness in general conference. I'm more happy, motivated, and feel my conversion deepening.
The mission talent show went pretty well - with my performance last year, they put me at the end of it, and i was super dehydrated, couldn't play the piano right, but everyone was able to feel the spirit and everyone stood and clapped - i felt like it was horrible but everyone else saw it as really good - mine was the only one where everyone stood and clapped, same as last year. I guess that goes to show in our lives how even though we make mistakes and may stumble, the important part is putting our all out there and reguardless of our imperfections, the result can be astounding.
So in the song of my life, I'm going to stumble on and keep improving, and hopefully someday people will stand and clap for me because I've given my all.
-a servant of the Lord,
~Elder Dallin Carlson
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